i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Randomize
