Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
My day in three words: secret purse cake
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
She has the best kind of daddy issues