Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
