If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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