I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
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Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
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