Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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