I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
