love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
