just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
He has the fingertips of a God
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