Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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