dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
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At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
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I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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