The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize