I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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