Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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