If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
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