Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
