Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Hippo gnu deer
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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