We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
