Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊