Texts From Last Night

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  (831): View more from California

  I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.

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  (831): I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco. http://tfl.nu/qnto
  Replies (34) Good night (3301) Bad night (499)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so

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  (201): Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so http://tfl.nu/vcrl
  Replies (21) Good night (3252) Bad night (858)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...

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  (603): I forgot how few teeth there are in this state... http://tfl.nu/03va
  Replies (34) Good night (1071) Bad night (4551)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.

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  (214): Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned. http://tfl.nu/8xw4
  Replies (23) Good night (1400) Bad night (4256)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..

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  (814): that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before.. http://tfl.nu/lsu6
  Replies (5) Good night (1081) Bad night (1998)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.

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  (518): I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave. http://tfl.nu/ne75
  Replies (2) Good night (608) Bad night (854)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens

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  (248): We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens http://tfl.nu/5a7g
  Replies (18) Good night (2120) Bad night (744)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.

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  (202): This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point. http://tfl.nu/l1mt
  Replies (10) Good night (2484) Bad night (898)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.

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  (217): Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again. http://tfl.nu/k53k
  Replies (9) Good night (1406) Bad night (502)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing

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  (617): Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing http://tfl.nu/5l2y
  Replies (5) Good night (996) Bad night (425)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.

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  (614): The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception. http://tfl.nu/6prr
  Replies (7) Good night (872) Bad night (312)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?

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  (269): I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that? http://tfl.nu/gk3a
  Replies (6) Good night (766) Bad night (252)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?

  (1-919): View more from North Carolina

  An artistic expression of her stupidity.

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  (919): what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding? (1-919): An artistic expression of her stupidity. http://tfl.nu/majp
  Replies (1) Good night (643) Bad night (237)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?

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  (781): What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest? http://tfl.nu/6m0u
  Replies (4) Good night (293) Bad night (412)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.

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  (516): I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly. http://tfl.nu/c92d
  Replies (2) Good night (441) Bad night (267)

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