I just made out with a guy for $7.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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