woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
