i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
Randomize