hell yes lets make some ravioli
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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