You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
