How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize
