nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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