Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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