I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
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