I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
