wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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