ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
