i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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