I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
