Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
