Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
