I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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