It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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