another moral hangover. fuck.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
