No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
