And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
