you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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