Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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