Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
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