Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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