From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
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