whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
