i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Randomize
