would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
