I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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