I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
